Airbnb Host
acrylic on canvas, 45 x 53 cm
“We arrived late and had to use our phone lights to find the way to the caravan. The host’s instructions were to climb through the barbed wire fence, cross the field and turn left off the dirt track when we reached the broken down tractor. We didn’t need to put the code in because the caravan door was wide open and the driving rain had flooded the inside. The host hadn’t made up the bed, we had to do that ourselves. The foldout mattress had a squashed centipede stuck to it. The toilet was disgusting - just a plastic bucket with sawdust. No water had been provided, only a note to say the pump was next to the enclosure for the Doberman, which barked through the night. I wouldn’t recommend this shit-heap to anyone and would give it zero stars if I could.”